


The Prank War

by boredom



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Humor, Pranks and Practical Jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-03
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-03-05 02:10:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3101309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boredom/pseuds/boredom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The knights are bored. Really bored. So what do you do when you're bored? Hold a prank war of course!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Leon's Great Idea

**Author's Note:**

> So I’m going to try something a little different. I have written this little prank war story which I will hopefully be updating every day. Each knight (and Merlin) will have their own chapter with their own prank. At the end you can comment on which was your favorite. The character with the most votes wins the prank war. Rules: I won’t count any votes that come before Chapter 8. You can only vote for one character. If there’s more than one listed I’ll just take the first name listed. And finally: only vote once. I hope this works out and that everyone has fun reading this.

Merlin flicked a grape across the table, landing in Gwaine’s hair. It wasn’t that impressive of a feat, considering Merlin had been flicking grapes at Gwaine for the past hour. There was bound to be one that actually landed in Gwaine’s glorious manly mane of splendidness. Gwaine, for his part, was sleeping soundly, head tipped back, mouth slightly opened, and snoring just a tad. 

“Merlin, stop it,” Leon grumbled. His feet were propped up on the table and he had been watching a fly buzz around in the air for the past thirty minutes. It was making magnificent patterns in the air, looping and curving artfully. Leon was sure that the fly wasn’t trying to be artful. But it was more interesting than anything that was going on in Camelot in the moment. 

“But I’m bored and Gwaine makes a great target,” Merlin groaned. He went to grab another grape only to discover that that was the last grape from the vine. Merlin gave another frustrated groan and smacked his head on the table. Leon glanced over when Merlin didn’t lift his head up, slightly afraid that the boy had managed to knock himself out. Sadly, he couldn’t tell from here but he was also currently too lazy to go check. Merlin would sort himself out eventually. Oh look, the fly changed the looping pattern so that he was coming from the left instead of the right. How interesting. 

“His hair is rather sticky. I shudder to think from what,” Percival responded. His head was resting in his hands. His eyes were glazed over, staring at a spot on the wall directly across from him. Percival began to try and imagine what could have caused the stain. Perhaps a hoard of evil pixies broke into the castle and chased a dog through the halls. This would cause a servant carrying wine to trip. The wine would spill over the ground. But it wouldn’t stain because a sorcerer was in front of the servant, catching most of the wine on himself. However, he would have slipped on the wine and the spell he was trying to cast misfired, thus turning the wall black in that one spot. Yes. That is what happened. 

Elyan sighed and blew out a puff of air. He wondered if he should grow his hair out again. There was a time when it was longer. It was hard to handle. Maybe a nice moustache instead? Naw, that was trying too hard. A beard? No. Gwaine, Leon, and Lancelot all had beards. At this point Elyan would just be seen as trying to follow them. 

“It doesn’t matter that you’re bored, quit flicking things at Gwaine,” Leon scolded. The fly landed on the window ledge. 

“Merlin’s right though, it’s so boring. You would think that once Morgana turned evil there would be more things to do,” Elyan groaned. He sat back on the chair. There was no new hairstyles for him to try. 

“Can we not talk about my sister.”

“Half sister,” Lancelot corrected. He leaned forward, looking straight at Arthur. Arthur turned, unsure what Lancelot wanted. No one had really moved in the hour they had been in Leon’s chambers. “Sire, I may be stepping out of line here, but we do need something to do. If this goes on for much longer, the men could get restless and things could get rowdy,” he said. Arthur groaned and ran a hand over his face. Judging how much activity had happened this past hour, he highly doubted the men would become restless. Useless in battle? Possibly. Restless? Less likely. 

“What do you want me to do about it? I can’t very well go to war because you people are bored and want some excitement,” he said, waving his hands in the air. His arms protested at the sudden movement, having lain limply at his sides, not so much at twitching.

“Yes you can. It’s easy. Essetir is ripe for the pickings since Cenred kicked the bucket,” Elyan said.

“I’m not going to war because you people are bored!” Everyone groaned. The fly flew out the open window. Leon felt even more bored at the loss of entertainment. Lancelot was right. They had to do something and fast. This was getting ridiculous. He looked thoughtful for a few minutes, scouring his brain for any idea. One came to him, causing him to smile. 

“That’s not good if Leon is smiling,” Merlin muttered. He started flicking the grape stems at Gwaine now. 

“Actually, I have an idea that should entertain us for a few days,” Leon replied. He gently tugged the grape stems out of Merlin’s hands. Gwaine yawned and slowly opened his eyes.

“I heard Leon’s got an idea. Is it more training?” he grumbled sleepily. 

“It better not be more training. My arms still hurt from the last bout,” Merlin grumbled. Leon shook his head.

“No, no. It’s not training, but it is in a way,” Leon said. The knights became slightly livelier at Leon’s words. By livelier I mean they actually started to move a bit. 

“Well, what is this brilliant idea?” Arthur asked. Leon turned to him and smiled.

“It’s a prank war.”

oOoOoOo

Merlin still wasn’t entirely sure what had come out of Leon’s mouth, even thirty minutes later in front of Gaius and Geoffrey. He was sure the stoic knight had mentioned something about a prank war, but that was something so un-Leon-like that Merlin wasn’t entirely sure that he had heard correctly. Months of boredom had led him to start hallucinating. That was just perfect. Now he would have to question whether things were really happening or if they were just in his head. 

“So, Gaius, Geoffrey, I would like you two to judge the pranks and decide who is the winner,” Leon said proudly. Gwaine raised his hand.

“Yes Gwaine?” Leon asked.

“I don’t get how this is supposed to be training. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good prank, but you said this was also training.” 

“Aw, yes. The purpose of a prank war is to figure out a way to not only humiliate your enemies, but to not get caught doing it. For this exercise, you will have to be stealthy, smart, and plan ahead,” Leon explained. Alright, that sounded more like Leon.

“I think you just want a chance to lose,” Gwaine sniggered. Gaius sighed and held up his hand.

“Gentlemen, so this doesn’t get out of hand, Geoffrey and I will go over some rules for you to follow.”

“First, each of you will draw a number out of this hat. The number you draw will determine the order that you go in,” Geoffrey croaked.

“Wouldn’t we expect the prank then?” Merlin asked.

“Well, we can’t have this going on forever. It will have to take place on the day.” Gaius explained. Everyone nodded and went to step forward, each pulling a number out of the hat. 

Percival was first, Elyan was second, Merlin was third, Arthur was fourth, Lancelot was fifth, Gwaine was sixth, and Leon was last.

“Do you all know the order you’re going in?” Gaius asked. The group nodded. “Good, now, for the second rule the pranks can’t put anyone in danger and cannot be illegal. Each prank Geoffrey and I will write notes and then at the end, we will compare and choose a winner,” Gaius finished. Everyone nodded their understanding.

“Are you ready to start this prank war?” Geoffrey asked.

“Yes!” the group responded. Finally! They were actually going to do something that wasn’t boring sword drills. Who knew, this might actually be a little fun.

“Good. Sir Percival, I hope that you have something good for us on Monday,” Geoffrey said before shuffling out of the door, followed by Gaius. The group stayed behind, staring at each other.

“I am so excited for this,” Elyan said once the two men had left.

“This will be so much fun,” Percival replied. 

“Do you already know what you’re going to do?” Arthur asked.  
“I do,” Percival replied

“I just hope no one takes my idea,” Merlin sighed. They shuffled out of the door, each excited and fully ready for what lay ahead. Percival was more than excited for his prank. It was going to be one tasty bite to eat. That was for sure.


	2. Day 1: Percival's Prank

Percival was practically skipping through the halls as he prepared for his prank. It had taken almost the entire day to get the cook to agree to the plan. He begged and pleaded with her, pulling out all the stops. He tried Merlin’s kicked puppy look. He tried Gwaine’s sexy smolder. He even tried Lancelot’s chivalrous saint routine. By the end of the evening, the cook was so tired of Percival’s pestering that she agreed to help. Though, what may have pushed her over the edge was the fact that Gwaine was going to suffer. She still hadn’t forgiven him for his last raid on the kitchen. It didn’t matter, though. This was going to be brilliant. Especially when he got a look at Gwaine’s face. The man was probably not going to forgive him, but it would be worth it just to win the challenge. 

Arthur had agreed to give the winner a few days off. Or, if he won, the knights would all be his servant for the next week. Percival wanted those few days off. He had to go into town and get some more stuff for his house and never had the time to do it with his busy schedule. His walls were bare and there were no personal touches in the room at all. Percival felt slightly lonely in that house. It looked as though he were a guest there, not an actual tenant. If he had a few days off, he could tour the market and find things that would personalize his room and make him feel even more at home. Yes, a few days off would be just fine for Percival.

He skipped to the kitchen, barely containing his excitement. Everything would go off without a hitch. He pushed open the door to see the staff already working vigorously for the day’s meals. He felt a little bad about piling on the extra work, but it was only six things to make. Linda said it wouldn’t be that hard. The hardest part would be making sure everyone ate them. They would all be on their guard today. Percival had to strike fast if he wanted to ensure success. 

“Sir Percival, I got ‘em right over ‘ere,” Linda said, leading Percival towards a tray of six delicious candied apples that were sitting proudly upon the tray. The red candy gleaming in the light, making the outside look delectable and mouthwatering. They looked absolutely perfect, not a flaw in sight. Percival almost wanted to take one for himself, only he knew what lie under that deceptive candy coating. He couldn’t help but smile. A grin that would rival Morgana’s. This was perfect. Percival felt his stomach flip in anticipation. He let out a small giggle. This was going to be awesome!

“Don’t you worry, darling, I got you one right here,” Linda said, pulling another candied apple out from behind her back. Percival took it and smiled. This woman was perfect. 

“You are a saint,” he said, taking a bite out of the apple and marveling in its sweetness. The candy crunched magnificently between his teeth. The juice from the apple flowing onto his tongue, making his taste buds dance with delight. He almost felt bad for his friends. They wouldn’t experience such a wonderful treat. 

“Don’t flatter me, dear. I’m a married woman. But, how are you going to get them to eat ‘em?” Linda asked, staring at the apples suspiciously. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve got a plan,” Percival said with a wink. The servants for the other knights filed into the kitchen and Percival put each of the apples on the trays that were being made for them. It was too early in the morning for anyone to be suspicious. Percival knew what these men were like in the morning. Honestly, the best time to attack Camelot would be in the morning, since no one was able to function. They would probably eat the apples without a second thought. 

Percival picked up the last apple and looked around. He smiled when he spotted a girl who was often seen talking with Merlin. They were good friends and Merlin wouldn’t question anything the girl gave to him. 

“Make sure to give this one to Merlin and tell him to eat it later. He usually leaves right after he serves Arthur his breakfast,” Percival said, pushing the last apple towards Sarah, another cook who was known to be a little sweet on Merlin. The cooks had a habit of trying to fatten Merlin up. 

“Don’t worry, sweetie, they won’t suspect a thing,” Linda said with a wink. Percival snuck out of the kitchen and ducked down the hall. He heard Merlin and Gwen walking down the hall together, chatting excitedly about the upcoming marriage of another servant. He grinned to himself. Everything was going swimmingly. Ducking through the hallways, Percival made his way back to his room. Now all that was left to do was to wait. 

oOoOoOo

Merlin dodged another cup flying at his head as he scrambled out of Arthur’s chambers. He wasn’t that late, so what was the prat so upset about. He sighed and ducked into an alcove, pulling out the candied apple Sarah had given him this morning. He was glad that she was so motherly towards him. It really was a nice reminder of his own mother. He hoped she didn’t spend too much time on the apple for him. He didn’t want to be a bother. 

Smiling, Merlin tossed the apple in his hands and wondered if he should give it to Gwen instead. She could use something sweet after all that had happened. Merlin frowned, Gwen actually didn’t like candied apples though. She thought they were too sweet and hurt her teeth. Merlin would get her some chocolate later, then. He smiled and put his teeth to the apple and bit down, taking a large chunk out of the meat of the fruit. Merlin excepted the crunch. He expected a mouthful of apple. That’s not what Merlin got. 

oOoOoOo

The knights all sat around the round table, gagging and vigorously rubbing their tongues to remove the taste of Percival’s “treat”. Gwaine gave a hacking cough. He stood up and whirled around, facing Percival. There were tear tracks down his cheeks. His eyes were pained and furious all at once. Percival let himself smile. His plan worked so well! It was absolutely fantastic! Leon was right, this was fun.

“Apples are sacred! You had no right!” he shouted, his finger waving at Percival. 

“Technically, they were onions,” Leon coughed. He was still wearing sleeping clothes, not changing before tasting Percival’s “treat”. 

“You actually got to the onion part. I was to busy trying to counteract the multitude of spicy spices he dumped into the candy coating. Come on, Percival, were you trying to kill us?” Lancelot gagged. Percival continued to laugh while Geoffrey and Gaius sat writing down notes on pieces of paper.

“Sir Percival, just so that we can be clear what your prank was, may you explain it to us?” Gaius said.

“Certainly, I dipped onions in a candy coating that had pepper, salt, garlic, oranges, mint, chili powder, and cinnamon,” Percival started. “Then, I put the “apples” on the breakfast platters, had Sarah give one to Merlin, and waited. Linda gave me a lovely candied apple to enjoy while I waited. It was ripe, juicy, and delicious. The candy was perfectly hard and sweet, ” Percival said, not being able to hold back a grin.

“I hate you. I legitimately want to kill you,” Arthur groaned. Gaius and Geoffrey nodded and continued to scribble things down on their papers. Finally, the two straightened back up.

“This was a wonderful start to this war, Sir Percival. Points for creativity and doing it early in the morning to get the most affect. You may have overdone it on the spices, though. Overall, good job. You boys have a lot to live up to,” Gaius said before walking out of the room. 

“Elyan, are you ready?” Gwaine asked, staring longingly at a “candied apple” that Merlin had carried to the meeting with him.

“I hope you are all prepared. I think I have a winner,” Elyan said, a smile playing on his face. If anyone managed to get into their rooms tomorrow, it would be a miracle.


	3. Fun Times with Elyan

Percival’s prank had been far from boring and predictable. His prank was a masterpiece. Elyan could still taste the spices in the candy coating. When he told Gwen what happened, she started laughing. It took almost ten minutes for her to regain her composure. So, needless to say, Elyan had to rework his prank. His previous idea was to put “kick me” signs on his friends’ backs. He thought it would be funny. Gwen laughed another ten minutes at that as well, just not in the same way she had laughed at Percival’s.  
So, Elyan stayed up all night trying to figure out something else to do. He ran his ideas by Gwen for her judgment. She refused to help him think up an idea, saying that it wouldn’t be fair to the others. However, she did say she could judge Elyan’s ideas, help him to figure out something that would top Percival’s pranks, as well as his other friends. Then, he could have his little vacation.

The few days off would be just enough to finish a brooch he was making for Gwen. He wanted to surprise her with it and refused to give her anything less than perfect. She deserved something nice after all that happened. The problem was the design was extremely intricate, meaning Elyan could just hammer it out in an afternoon. So, if Elyan won, he would be able to make it while Gwen was at work. 

In the end, it came down to one thing: Percival was subtle. You didn’t know you had been pranked until you had the absolute displeasure of biting into one of his “apples”. Elyan was going to go big. You know what they say, go big or go home. And Elyan wasn’t going to go home. No. He was going to make a splash. He was going to do something that couldn’t possibly be ignored by anyone. Yes, they would be talking of this prank for years to come! Maybe that was a bit over the top. But Elyan was sure to make waves with his prank. Now, he just had to find the time to do it. 

The perfect time to complete the prank was just after lunch. Merlin was down in the armory sharpening swords. Leon, Percival, and Gwaine were on a short patrol in the surrounding woods. And Arthur was in a council meeting for the next three hours. Elyan was supposed to be guarding the front gate, but there were ways around that. Sir Galahad was more than happy to take over once Elyan slipped a few gold coins to the knight. Gaius said nothing about bribery. Elyan gathered up his supplies and ensured that everyone was out of the way. They had been suspicious of Elyan all day, cautiously eating food and checking around every corner for traps. But in the end, they couldn’t just neglect their duties, they had to leave Elyan alone for a few short hours. 

Elyan skipped through the halls with the supplies in hand. He had strategically placed supplies all around the castle so he didn’t have to make long trips back down to the courtyard to replenish. Each moment he wasted on resupplying was a moment where he could get caught. This needed to be fast. He needed to be the perfect one-man army. Elyan slipped into Leon’s room and looked around at his canvas. This was almost going to be too easy.

“Let’s get started, shall we?” he asked the empty room. A smile broke over his face. The perfect canvas indeed. 

oOoOoOo

Leon stumbled back to his room. The patrol had been terrible. No bandits had attacked them, but that still didn’t stop anything and everything from going wrong. Sir Marcus’ horse managed to get stuck in a mud puddle. This halted the patrol to a stop as the knights all had to help dig out the dumb beast. Then, Gwaine got the bright idea to stick his hand in a beehive. A beehive! Honestly, did that man not have any common sense? After being chased by a swarm of angry, stingy bees, The group got hopelessly lost, having deviated from the proper path. By this point Leon was muddy, tired, and in pain. They managed to make it back to the trail, but they had to go through a series of bristle bushes to get to it. After that, One of the new recruits, Sir Pedro or something, fell off his bloody horse and sprained his ankle. 

The day had been terrible. Leon limped along the halls, growling at a few people who bothered to ask if he was alright. The rest just sort of jumped out of the way. All Leon wanted to do was go back to his room and take a nice, hot, long bath. He didn’t want to fill out reports. He didn’t want to train. He didn’t want to deal with the prank war. Why did he think this was a good idea again? Whatever, right now, he had to worry about whatever the hell Elyan had come up with. Lord knows what went on in his head. Leon wouldn’t be surprised to see a buck up snakes stuffed into his bed. 

“Elyan’s probably done something terrible,” he muttered. A few of the servants in the corridor looked at the head knight worriedly but said nothing on the matter. They knew better than to interfere with matters of the Round Table. Everyone in Camelot knew that. 

Finally, Leon managed to trudge back to his room, leaving a trail of mud, leaves, sticks, and probably blood behind him. He could care less. Right now there were more important things to attend to, like a nice bath. Leon pushed open the door and stepped inside. 

The castle heard a resounding chorus of splashes followed by a string of rather naughty curse words. Mothers had to cover their children’s ears so as not to corrupt their innocence. And, it was all because of one Sir Elyan, a knight of the round table. 

oOoOoOo

“Should I get you boys some towels?” Gaius sniggered. The knights all sat there, arms crossed, glaring at Elyan. If looks could kill. Gwaine wrung out his hair again, causing a small puddle of water to form on the floor. Merlin wiped some water off his brow, shaking it onto the floor. 

“There are so many cups on the ground! How are we supposed to clean it up?!” Gwaine shouted, waving his soaked arms around the room in a rather dangerous fashion. “Honestly! First the apples and then my hair. Is nothing sacred anymore?” Gwaine continued to shout.

“Your hair is not a national treasure. Quit being dramatic,” Arthur grumbled, looking as if he was serious considering executing Elyan. Geoffrey smiled and turned to Elyan, who was looking rather smug with himself.

“Sir Elyan, could you explain your prank to us?” he asked. Elyan let out a loud laugh, trying to stop so that he could explain.

“I did not expect it to work out that well!” he said in between laughs. 

“Yeah, yeah. You’re a genius,” Lancelot grumbled, trying to wipe some of the water that was still streaming down his face. 

“I know, right?” Elyan beamed, finally calming down enough to talk. “While these guys were out, I went into each of their rooms and filled hundreds of little cups full of water. I then positioned a bucket above the door so that when they opened it, SPLASH! Right on their heads,” Elyan explained, waving his hands dramatically.

“Oh I’ll give you a bucket to the head,” Gwaine said, standing up. Leon pulled him back down.

“I suppose this is better than no bath at all,” Leon sighed. The water had been cold too. Nothing like a bucket of ice water to wake up the brain. 

“Or something sticky,” Merlin muttered. Elyan gave a mock bow while Gaius and Geoffrey discussed the prank away from the group. Once they were done, they returned to the boys.

“Sir Elyan, we give you points for your patience. Filling up all those cups must have been a very tedious task. However, the water bucket could have seriously injured someone. But, the fact that there are so many parts makes it difficult to clean up, giving this prank a lasting element. Good job. Sir Percival, you have some competition it would appear,” Gaius said. The knights shuffled out of the room, still dripping.

“Merlin, I love you, but be very careful about what you’re planning,” Gwaine growled, trying to restyle his hair. 

“I will not hold back because you can’t take a joke,” Merlin said.

“Just don’t go overboard,” Lancelot said tiredly. It was only day two and he was already considering dropping out. The only reason no one had given up was because they all had ideas that they were eager to try. Merlin knew he was going to play a bit… dirtier than the others. It was going to be great.


	4. Day 3: Why Merlin Shouldn't Be Left Alone

The sun wasn’t even up yet. Dawn had just come over the castle, starting to fill the corridors with light, chasing off the darkness that had bathed Camelot the previous night. Though, Merlin’s thoughts about the morning weren’t quiet so poetic. Instead, it went something like this:

“For the love of God why did I think this was a good idea?” Merlin grumbled to himself. He yawned and rubbed his eyes, trying to shake off the last bit of sleep that was still plaguing him. “Honestly, I should have just stayed in bed. This sucks. I hate Leon for coming up with this stupid idea,” he continued to mumble. No one was out in the halls, not this early in the morning. Behind him, a few sacks were floating innocently behind him. Merlin refused to carry all six with him through the castle. He did want to be able to feel his arms by the end of the day. 

On top of getting up at the crack of dawn, Merlin also had to stay up late the previous night to get his supplies. Bogs were now Merlin’s least favorite place to take a walk. He had gotten stuck, twice! But once he was done with this, he could tiptoe back to bed and sleep until it was time to get Arthur up. 

He couldn’t very well do this later in the day, since Arthur would more than likely be keeping him busy and under constant watch. Percival and Elyan had really caused a stir. No one wanted Merlin to be alone for long. 

But Merlin would definitely win this prank. When he managed to get some days off, he could go into the woods and practice some new spells. There was one that could turn flowers different colors. He knew how much Gwen liked blue flowers, but they were rather rare in these parts. He could also catch up on sleep. Just the thought of sleeping in made Merlin smile and pick up the pace. There was so much he wanted to do, and he would make sure it was done correctly. The knights may want to kill him after this, but it was all worth it for a win. Merlin smiled as he reached Percival’s room. 

“æbære” he whispered. The lock clicked open and Merlin ducked into the room. Percival was sleeping soundly in the bed. Merlin had put sleeping draughts in all their food the previous evening to ensure he didn’t have as much to worry about. Merlin began to tiptoe towards the closet, one sack following him through the room. His foot caught an upturned corner of the rug, sending Merlin sprawling to the floor. Luckily, Percival merely shifted in his bed, continuing to snore. Merlin breathed a sigh of relief and turned to the bag, sitting patiently in the air. 

“dælan” Merlin whispered. The sack opened and the contents split, one going towards the closet, the other hovering above Percival’s head. Merlin stood up and went to secure the mess. Once he ensured it wouldn’t happen too soon, he turned to the room and smiled. 

“This is going to be great,” he whispered to himself.

oOoOoOo

Percival awoke, having had a great slumber, the best he had had in awhile. He sat in the bed, a small smile on his face. He didn’t think Merlin would do anything too bad. The kid was an innocent puppy. Then again, Elyan had pulled a pretty good prank. He wondered what Merlin’s prank was for the day. Something told him that Merlin was not as innocent as Lancelot made him out to be. There was a sort of mischievous smile that Percival sometimes caught. It made him slightly afraid because it was always the quiet ones that could do the most damage. If Merlin truly were a devilish little imp, it could spell disaster for Percival’s day. Percival rolled over and saw a little cup sitting in the corner. He groaned and rolled back over.

“I thought I got them all,” he sighed. The little cups had completely covered the floor, each filled with water. He wouldn’t be surprised if he found cups for the next three years. “Whatever, time to start the day,” Percival said, throwing off his blankets. Shrieks from the knights echoed through the castle. Today was going to suck, Percival decided. 

oOoOoOo

Gaius sighed and looked at the dirty men before him. He was starting to regret the decision to monitor this activity. 

“This room is going to get rather dirty during this war, isn’t it?” he asked the men. Lancelot pulled another worm out of his hair and placed it gently on the table. The worm squirmed uncomfortably on the table. Merlin jumped up and but the worm in a bucket with some of the others that had found their way onto the knights. 

“Really Merlin, you had to put worms in with the dirt?” Gwaine sighed. He seemed resigned to the fact that he would not be getting laid during the war, mostly due to the state of his hair. Merlin shrugged and grinned.

“The dirt just didn’t seem to be enough,” he said, smiling like an idiot.

“I hope you know you’ll be cleaning all of the clothes you ruined, Merlin,” Arthur snapped. Merlin let out a loud laugh.

“You should have seen your face when you opened the cupboard,” Merlin said. 

“I’m never going to get this all off,” Elyan sighed, picking out some bog plants from his clothes. Gaius let out a snicker but quickly schooled his features into one of discipline.   
“Merlin, can you please explain what you did?” Geoffrey asked. Merlin nodded.

“Certainly. The previous night, I laced everyone’s food with a sleeping potion and then went to the bog where I collected six bags full of mud, plants, and worms.” Percival let out a screech, jumping out of his chair and sprinting to the other end of the room. “Oh, there might be spiders in there as well. Anyways, I then got up this morning and went around to each room. I put some of the dirt into a bucket that would dump when the blankets were thrown off the bed. The rest of the dirt went into the cupboard so that when they went to get new clothes, there would be an avalanche,” Merlin explained, grinning the entire time. 

“And now you have an avalanche of laundry to clean,” Arthur muttered.

“I don’t think the comparison works, sire,” Leon said. He numbly noted that there was a worm currently squirming on the top of his head and one in his shirt. He didn’t feel like removing it, though. That would just take too much work. Gaius and Geoffrey once again removed themselves from the table to discuss the prank. Once they returned, everyone quieted down to hear what they had to say.

“It was certainly messy, Merlin. And the use of worms definitely made it more gross than Sir Elyan’s while still being more long lasting than Sir Percival’s. However the dirt over the beds could have gone off at any time during the night and I’m not sure I approve of the sleeping potion,” Geoffrey explained. Merlin nodded. Maybe his chances of winning weren’t as good as he originally thought. The men excused themselves and made their way through the corridor.

“Do you have something good, Princess?” Gwaine grumbled. A trail of dirt was left as the men walked.

“I do. I just wish Merlin would have waited until after we were out of our sleeping clothes,” Arthur grumbled.

“The embarrassment just adds to the prank,” Merlin snickered. Arthur looked around at the other men. They were going to be green with envy when they realized what Arthur had planned. He was sure of it.


	5. Arthur loves colorful Characters

Alright, this wasn’t fair. Percival, Elyan, and Merlin had all raised the bar on their pranks spectacularly high. They were creative, unique, and most importantly, memorable. How in the hell was Arthur going to be able to top that? 

Arthur flipped back onto his stomach, letting out a groan. 

“This is impossible,” he mumbled into the pillow. He had been up for the entire night, trying to think of something good to do. He didn’t need more servants for a day, but he could still torture them a little. Plus, it would help to give Merlin a slight break if he had five other people helping him out. Not that Arthur cared about the health of a manservant. No, he just wanted his chores to be done more efficiently. Merlin would still work, of course, just have less work. Besides, it was more about Arthur’s ego than gaining a few more servants for a day. Arthur groaned again and flipped onto his back. Putting a bucket of mud over the doors wouldn’t do anymore. Plus, Elyan and Merlin both did very similar pranks. This wasn’t working. Arthur needed to reconfigure his plan.

He threw off the covers and jumped out of the bed. The cool night air hit his body, causing goose bumps to rise out of his skin. Here, in the cold air, Arthur’s thoughts began to clear. He couldn’t very well lose to a few knights and a servant.

“I will do something absolutely amazing!” he proclaimed to the empty room. “I am a king. A king is not allowed to be outdone by some underlings!” As his brain began to protest from lack of sleep, Arthur began contemplating the use of servants. He could just order the men to come up with something. Only, that wouldn’t be quite fair to the others. If he really wanted to show he was a good leader, he would need to do this on his own. Only, a few more minutes later, Arthur still had nothing. He plopped down onto the chair by the table.

“I can’t even think of a simple prank to do!” he cried. Then again, that might actually be part of the problem. Everyone had been so crafty with their pranks. They were at different times in the day. They were subtle until you actually experienced them. Anything Arthur thought about was either too simple or too complicated. 

“I’ll convince them that there is a ghost in the castle!” Arthur cried leaping up from his chair. He quickly sank back down. “Stupid idea. They’ll be expecting something like that. They probably won’t even be scared,” he muttered. 

Arthur prided himself on his ability to think up a solution for almost any problem, but now, now there was nothing there for him to think up. His mind was a blank slate. It was as if someone had wiped away every original thought he had ever had.

“I bet it’s Leon’s fault. He’s always sabotaging me, the bastard,” Arthur grumbled. He sighed and decided to go back to bed. There was no use sitting around if he was just going to run around in circles. Maybe he could come up with something while he slept. His mind would be free from rational thought as it dreamed through the solution.   
Of course, Arthur got an idea a lot faster than if he were just to fall asleep. His foot caught the hem of a shirt that had been left on the floor. Arthur fell forward into an undignified heap before untangling his foot from the shirt. He glared angrily at it. It used to be white, but Merlin accidently washed it with one of his red shirts and now it was a hideous shade of pink. Wait. That’s it! Arthur got himself off the ground and dusted himself off, the shirt still clutched in his hand. That was how he was going to win this competition! Oh, he couldn’t wait for the others to see what he had done. They would be so mad. Arthur fell back into bed with a smile on his face. He was going to win this.

oOoOoOo

“I am so tired!” Gwaine cried as the training continued. He let his sword fall to the ground with a thump. 

“Well maybe if you actually went to bed at a decent time instead of spending your nights at the tavern you would be less tired,” Leon snapped. He was anxious to see what Arthur was planning. The king had been awfully happy this morning, which made Leon all the more suspicious. Not only that, but training was incredibly hard today. Arthur seemed intent of working all of them into the ground. Gwaine was covered in mud and exhausted. The other’s weren’t faring much better. Even Merlin had been sent to the stocks earlier that morning for some reason or another. Probably having to do with the mud from the previous day. Gwaine had been picking worms and spiders out of his hair to the rest of the day.

“If this is your idea of a prank, princess, it sucks,” Gwaine muttered. Arthur shook his head.

“This is a terrible idea for a prank,” he said, his mouth splitting opened into a predatory grin. It made Gwaine shudder. As soon as the grin had been put there, it was gone, replaced with Arthur’s “business” face. 

“I think that’s enough for today. Everyone go get cleaned up. There’s a council meeting in three hours,” Arthur turned on his heels and began to walk away. “And someone let Merlin out of the stocks. Tell him to wash up before serving me again. I can’t have him smelling up my chambers,” he called, giving a wave of the hand.   
“I’ll go let him out,” Percival said, slightly out of breath. He waved to the knights before trotting off towards the town square. 

Gwaine walked back to his chambers. He was looking for a nice long soak in the tub after today’s training. That was something he couldn’t wait to wash off. The servants had already poured him a nice hot bath. Gwaine groaned as he sank his sore body into the steaming water. It felt so good to just sit here and let the worries wash away with the dirt. He closed his eyes and began pouring the water over his head, trying to get the dirt out of his hair. It was only after he finished scrubbing his body that he looked down at his skin and gave a shout.

“Arthur! I’m gonna kill you!” It echoed through the halls where Arthur was eagerly awaiting to hear those words. 

oOoOoOo

“Well don’t you all look lovely,” Arthur cooed sarcastically. Leon and Gwaine’s hair was still plastered on their heads. Leon probably looked the worst, considering he had blond hair. Merlin looked the best, considering he just scrubbed the rotten fruits out of his hair and never took a full out bath.

“We are all pink, your highness,” Leon snapped. Arthur tilted his head back and laughed.

“You should see yourselves in the mirror.”

“Oh I saw myself in the mirror alright,” Elyan snapped. His skin had turned a weird color because of the dye. Arthur sat back and stared at the men, please with the result. Gaius and Geoffrey walked in.

“Oh my!” Gaius said, taking a step back upon seeing the men all looking rather…pink. Arthur started to laugh hysterically at this. Gwaine just glared at him, pretending that he had the ability to fry Arthur’s hair with his brain. 

“I see you turned them all pink,” Geoffrey said. Arthur nodded.

“I made sure to work them hard so that they had no choice but to take a bath. I sent Merlin to the stocks because he always washes himself afterwards. I then gave dye packets to the servants who put it in the water. The men went to wash up, and they turned pink. End of story,” he said proudly.

“You are the spawn of Satan,” Lancelot muttered under his breath. Arthur laughed again.

“This was so much better than pretending there was a ghost in the castle,” he said. Geoffrey cleared his throat.

“Well, sire, I can say that I am impressed. This prank will surely last a while, am I correct?” Arthur nodded.

“Long lasting, but I do think it’s too simple and too many things could have gone wrong. It needed just a bit more planning,” Gaius said, taking notes on the piece of paper.

“Sir Lancelot, I do believe it is your turn tomorrow,” Geoffrey said. Lancelot nodded. He was slightly nervous about his prank. But the results would be worth it.


	6. Day 6: Lancelot Loves Redecorating

There was still a pink tinge to Lancelot’s skin, he noticed in the dark hallways. Suddenly, Lancelot’s prank was too nice for Arthur. He should stick frogs in the man’s bed for good measure. Lancelot shook his head and continued to trudge down the halls. Suddenly, the entire prank was too much work for Lancelot. He really should have asked Merlin for help. He wasn’t sure if using magic would have disqualified him, but he was sorely tempted to go wake his friend up. Besides, Merlin had used magic in his prank. There was no way he could have hung those buckets or carried all the sacks around the castle without it. Merlin had the upper body strength of a newborn hamster.

But Merlin’s upper body strength wasn’t the big issue here, the big issue was how much Geoffrey and Gaius would take off for Lancelot slipping another sleeping potion in all the food. Merlin got in trouble for it, but there was really no way for Lancelot to complete this prank without some sort of aid. 

Lancelot had managed to complete all but Arthur’s room. Each room had brought about tension like no other. Every sneeze, snore, shift caused Lancelot to jump, freeze in place, and then wait until he was sure no one was waking up. He was way too stressed for a simple prank war. 

He finally got to Arthur’s room, peaking in and ensuring that no one was awake. Arthur was lying peacefully on his bed, dreaming about something great. Lancelot slipped into the room and began to complete the final stage of his prank. He dropped to the floor and took out a piece of string, marking the spot it ended. It took about an hour to successfully complete the entire project. Man, next time he was doing something simple. But, failure was not an option. He had to make this prank amazing. 

If he did win this challenge, there was so much he could do with the few days off. He could help Merlin and Gwen. Merlin always did the work of four men. If Lancelot had the day off, he could help with Gaius, or do research on whatever dangerous magical beast was currently threatening them. Maybe even help out with the serving duties. And, he could also help out Gwen. Time spent with Gwen was always time well spent. Lancelot stood up to admire his handy work. He decided that after supper would be the perfect time to let everyone know what he did, if they didn’t figure it out first, of course. Then again, he might just take pity on everyone and tell them sooner. Whenever he did decide to tell them, he was sure to get a good laugh.

oOoOoOo

“Good morning — oof!” Merlin’s voice said. Arthur sat up to see his manservant rubbing his midsection. 

“What did you do?” Arthur asked. 

“Ran into the table. The same thing happened this morning in Gaius’ chambers,” Merlin admitted. Arthur shook his head and rolled out of bed.

“I guess you’re just more clumsy than normal,” he sighed. However, the words were barely out of his mouth before his foot caught the edge of the bed, sending Arthur sprawling to the floor. What the hell?

“I see you’re as graceful as ever,” Merlin snickered. Arthur looked up just in time to see Merlin put the breakfast tray on the table, only to be off by a few inches, sending the food crashing to the ground. Merlin stopped snickering and ran out the room, saying something about picking up some more breakfast. How much did Merlin have to drink at the tavern last night? Arthur sighed and went to the wardrobe. He reached to open the door but his hand caught nothing but air. Arthur glared at the wardrobe. Something was off. He looked at the room but saw nothing unusual. Could it be that he got new drapes? Maybe a new rug? Arthur shook his head as Merlin came in again. He was chattering away about something, Arthur couldn’t really be bothered to pay attention. He did, however, notice Merlin trying to make the bed, only to miss the mattress and stumble onto it instead.

“Merlin, could you please try to not be so clumsy. The last thing I need if for you to break your neck on something,” Arthur snapped. Merlin sat up.

“Sorry, sire, I don’t know what’s going on today,” Merlin responded. He did look genuinely confused as to what was happening. Arthur had to admit, even by Merlin’s usual standards this amount of clumsiness was getting ridiculous. 

Arthur went to change behind the screen, only to run into the side of it, sending the furniture crashing to the floor. Alright, something was definitely not right about this room! There was no extra furniture, no new drapes, nothing missing. And yet, for the rest of the day Arthur ran into more and more objects. He ran into the side of the wardrobe, tripped over the table, and even threw his clothes several meters to the side of the laundry basket. Merlin wasn’t doing much better. He went to light the fire only to fall over the pile of logs and light the stones around the fire place, not the actual wood itself. 

It wasn’t until the end of the day that Arthur finally figured out why everything seemed so off: Lancelot.

oOoOoOo

Lancelot looked rather smug with himself. Arthur decided it wasn’t a good look for the knight. Lancelot was supposed to be the noble and honorable one. He was supposed to be the one that could never pull such a harsh prank simply because he cared too much about the health and sanity of his men. And normally, Lancelot did look kind and caring. Except for right here, right now. Here, he looked like some victor in a battle, someone who was overconfident in his abilities. Arthur had a feeling that Lancelot’s expression had something to do with all the tripping that had happened that day. Well, he didn’t have a “feeling” he knew without doubt that Lancelot had something to do with the tripping. 

“Sir Lancelot, can you tell us about your prank?” Geoffrey asked. Gwaine muttered something about a bruise on his ribcage. Elyan was massaging a stubbed toe. And Leon was sporting a nice bruise on his forehead. Lancelot nodded, still smiling that sick smile, the bastard.

“Certainly. I placed a sleeping draught in everyone’s food and then moved everything in the room five inches to the left. That way, when you tried to move around the room, everything would be just slightly off and you would run into stuff,” he responded. The knights all groaned in unison.

“That’s why everything felt so off today,” Percival said.

“I hope you know you’ll be putting everything back,” Arthur growled. He was not repeating today.

“Subtle yet impressive,” Gaius muttered, scribbling words onto a page. “But another use of the sleeping draught, I’m not sure that was entirely fair.”

“I’ll say. Though, I couldn’t even figure out what Lance was doing,” Gwaine said. Geoffrey nodded.

“I do agree that this was a rather subtle prank, however the fact that the knights never managed to trace it back to you is a problem. They didn’t realize what was happening. Perhaps it was too subtle? Plus, there was a lot of pain. I’m not sure how funny it was to the knights,” Geoffrey said. Lancelot’s smile dropped a fraction. Alright, he may not be as safe in winning as previously thought.

“I still think it was different than the others. They were in your face and rather obvious. Lancelot, good job. Sir Gwaine, I hope you have something good for us,” Gaius said. Geoffrey and he made their way out of the room. Gwaine smiled. The previous pain of the day was forgotten as he skipped out of the room. Everyone knew that when Gwaine skipped, bad things were going to happen.


	7. Day 7: Gwaine Can Do Makeup

Gwaine continued to hum merrily as he applied more make up to his cheeks. He picked up the hood and tried it on again, making sure there weren’t any weird lumps or folds that would give him away. It looked to be alright, much to Gwaine’s pleasure. He had spent the entire week trying to get ready for this prank. He didn’t have a lot of time to change something if this didn’t work. Though, the mask was a bit difficult to see out of. Oh well, all in the name of wining. 

“Oh my, aren’t you a handsome devil,” he chuckled. He took a step back to observe himself in the mirror, trying to see if his costume was on par with his vision. It wasn’t well known with his friends, but Gwaine was also very good at sewing and applying makeup. There had been a girl, and a parrot. Gwaine wasn’t entirely sure with the details. He had been drinking a lot during that relationship. However, after the camel had successfully burned down the tavern, thus breaking up Gwaine and…Giselle (yeah, that sounded about right) for good, Gwaine had acquired a fantastic new skill set. And boy was it going to come in handy today. The picture in his mind fit his reflection almost perfectly. Now, everything just had to go according to plan.

He had recruited the head maid, Lavender, to help him out. If he won, he would take her out for a bite to eat. Then, sleep in for once. Maybe go down to the training field and tease the knights about having to work. Oh, and he would help Percival finish his shopping and Merlin with his herb gathering. He didn’t like Merlin going out into the woods all on his own. Gwaine continued to twist and turn in the mirror, ensuring that his make up was perfect and the costume was perfect. A little touch up here, some more darting there, all minor adjustments that didn’t really need to be done. No one would look closely at him. 

Gwaine had just about run out adjustments to make when there was a knock at the door.

“Coming,” Gwaine called. He hoped it was Lavender. If it was any of the knights, the prank would found out and he would be unable to win. He opened the door a smidge to reveal Lavender standing there, looking rather excited. He breathed a sigh of relief. She slipped in past Gwaine.

“Well don’t you look marvelous!” she exclaimed. Her smiled widened upon examining Gwaine’s costume in more detail. 

“Yeah, can you help me with the hair? I can’t get it all slicked back,” he said. There were a few strands that refused to stay put. Gwaine almost considered shaving his head. Only, he did like his hair a lot. Hopefully Lavender would be able to pull them back. If not, then Gwaine would just have to ignore the tickling strands until everyone had been pranked. Lavender nodded and helped Gwaine pull back his hair. Once it was securely fastened, Lavender opened the door and peeked out. 

“Alright, the coast in clear. Let’s hurry before people start to wake up,” she whispered. Gwaine grabbed his sewing kit and his makeup pallet so he could do some last minute touch ups in their destination. He grabbed Lavenders shoulder with his free hand and allowed himself to be led through the castle to their destination. 

“I can’t wait to see everyone’s faces. But why didn’t you ask Gwen to help you?” Lavender asked. There was no one out this early, lucky for Gwaine. Unlucky for him, he had to stay in this damn costume for almost the entire day. It was already starting to ride up and itch. 

“I was afraid she’d tell someone. Her and Merlin have a pretty honest relationship and I didn’t want anyone to be the least bit suspicious,” Gwaine explained. Lavender nodded and led him into the room. Gwaine plopped down in the chair. He and lavender worked to complete the look. Lavender lit the fire, helping to dim the room so that it wasn’t as easy to see Gwaine was in the room. Finally, the preparations were done. “Thanks for helping me. Allow me to take you out sometime,” Gwaine said. Lavender blushed and swatted his shoulder. 

“I’m just doing this because I really love pranks,” she said. Gwaine smiled and leaned back, waiting for his victims to arrive. This was going to be great.

oOoOoOo

“So why do you need to talk to me again?” Elyan asked. Lavender smiled and continued leading him through the halls. 

“I’m doing a survey of all the noblemen and women in the castle to ensure they have no complaints. As one of the head maids, it is my duty to ensure the people of Camelot live in the best comfort possible,” she responded. Elyan nodded. At least Gwaine hadn’t done his prank yet. There were no frogs in his bed this morning. There was no mud in his shoes. It was actually awfully quiet. Normally, Gwaine couldn’t shut up. You could tell where he was at simply because of the noise. However, today, he was lacking from castle life. It made Elyan much more afraid of his prank. Gwaine was downright evil. 

But, thoughts of Gwaine were pushed aside. Now, it was time to help out Lavender. She was such a nice girl. Making people comfortable was something she thrived to do. Why, Lavender was possibly the nicest person Elyan ever had the pleasure of meeting. He took a step into a rather cozy room. There were two plush armchairs next to a fire, a small table with some tea sitting next to a green one. The other looked to be a floral pattern. It was rather dim in the room, the only source of light being the fireplace. He wondered if Lavender’s eyes were bothering her. 

“Please sit,” Lavender said, gesturing towards the floral chair. Elyan gladly took a seat. He expected to sink into a soft armchair, nice and plush and fantastic to sit in. But he was met with an uncomfortable chair. It was all hard and lumpy. He grimaced as the chair’s frame dug into his legs and backside. “Comfortable?” Lavender asked sweetly. Elyan didn’t want to offend the girl. She seemed quite happy on her own green chair. Elyan shifted again, trying to find some way to get comfortable. It was impossible. 

“Just a little sore from yesterday’s training,” Elyan said. It wasn’t a complete lie; Arthur had worked them hard yet again. Only, his soreness wasn’t being helped by the fact that this chair was so goddamn lumpy. Lavender smiled and poured some tea.

“Do you eat the kitchens food often?” she asked. Elyan shook his head. Okay, how could a chair be lumpy, squishy, and hard all at the same time?

“Only for important occasions. I don’t tend to eat the castle’s food, living with Gwen and all,” he responded. Lavender wrote down something on a piece of paper. Elyan took this time to shift yet again. What the hell was in this chair? It felt as though he was sitting on someone’s lap. Lavender looked up and Elyan stopped his shifting. He hoped he wouldn’t have to sit on this chair for too long. 

“What about the general temperature of the castle?” Lavender asked. Why would he care about the temperature of the castle? Elyan opened his mouth, but he never answered. Instead, he got a very nice presentation of Gwaine’s prank.

oOoOoOo

“That was the best thing I have ever done,” Gwaine said, laughing his head off. His makeup and clothes were still done up. They were a little smudged from being sit six times, but he still looked like the freaking chair. 

“That was terrifying,” Lancelot said. He was a bit pale. Strange considering he had been one of the first to experience Gwaine’s prank. 

“At least you didn’t scream like a girl!” Gwaine laughed, doubling over at the thought.

“I did not scream like a girl,” both Arthur and Elyan said at the same time. Elyan shuddered as he remembered exactly what had happened. He had opened his mouth to answer Lavender’s question when the chair he was sitting on grew arms and grabbed onto him. Gwaine had roared in Elyan’s ear and Elyan had leapt up, trying to escape the monster that was attacking him. He had screamed, kicked, and screamed some more. Only to hear Gwaine laughing his head off.

“Oh, Leon, you owe Lavender a new tea set, seems how you kicked the other one off the table,” Gwaine said. Leon ground his teeth and turned away from the knight. 

“Did Lavender sew your clothes for you?” Merlin asked, he was looking a bit pale from Gwaine’s prank. Though that was probably more due to the fact that Lavender’s armchair caught fire. Gwaine wondered how that had happened. The flames from the hearth probably leapt out. But the chair wasn’t that close to the fireplace. Oh well, no use puzzling over it. 

“No, I made these myself. Living on the road can give you all sorts of skills,” Gwaine admitted, trying to take Merlin’s mind off the fire that had nearly burned him. Merlin nodded shakily, causing Gwaine to feel a little guilty. He really hadn’t meant to scare the kid that badly. Before he could comfort Merlin anymore, Gaius and Geoffrey walked in.

“Oh my word!” Gaius exclaimed upon seeing Gwaine’s costume, his hand clutching his heart and his face paling slightly. He quickly recovered and sat down at the table. 

“I sewed a costume that had the same cloth as one of Lavender’s armchair. I then cut out a hole I could sit in. When someone sat on me, I would grab them and roar in their ear an watch them scream like little girls,” Gwaine laughed. Gaius and Geoffrey whispered to each other before turning back to the group.

“Very creative idea. However, I do think it was a bit risky. Did you not think that the knights would retaliate upon having you attack like some sort of possessed object?” Geoffrey asked. 

“I made sure Lavender took their swords,” Gwaine said, shrugging and flipping his hair. It had since fallen out the ponytail Lavender had put it up in.

“You also took a risk with having people come to you. But, overall, I do think this prank was a good idea. It clearly took a lot of time and effort. The results were fairly funny as well. Sir Leon, you are the last contender. I hope you have something good for us,” Gaius said. He and Geoffrey took their leave. Leon sighed and turned to the group.

“I hope you are all prepared. You won’t be able to recover from this one as quickly as the others,” he said nonchalantly. 

“Recover as quickly! I still have pink ears,” Lancelot cried. Leon smiled.

“I have something much worse in mind,” he replied. The knights looked anxiously at each other. Leon merely stood up and walked out the door. “Goodnight, I hope everyone gets a good night’s sleep. You’re going to need it.”


	8. Leon is a Minimalist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last prank. You have until Friday, January 16th to vote. Only vote once and only for one character. I can't wait to see the results.

Leon woke up bright and happy. He wasn’t entirely sure his prank was going to win, but he was going to enjoy every minute of it. With a few days off he could visit with some old friends, finish reading that book he had started, maybe go for a nice leisurely ride. Leon grinned. He wasn’t so cocky as to think his prank was invincible. But he was sure that he was at least a contender for the prize. He hoped out of bed and prepared for the day. No one was going to see this one coming. 

oOoOoOo

Gwaine looked in the mirror and prepared himself. This was the final day of this war. He had fought long and hard for his title. All he had left to do was to survive whatever Leon had planned. Would it be slugs in their boots? No, Merlin would never approve of using an animal in that way. Then again, he did stick worms and spiders in the mud. Gwaine shuddered, remembering the feeling of the squirmy, slimy critters on the top of his head. He hoped that Leon had something less… messy planned. He didn’t want to try and clean up his room or hair again. He took more baths this week than he had the past year.

Perhaps molasses spread over door handles and swords? No, that was too messy for Leon. The man was meticulous when if came to the cleanliness of the castle. Gwaine wouldn’t be surprised if Leon had taken up a second job as a servant, just to help ensure the castle was clean. Gwaine furrowed his brow and stepped out the door. 

He walked through the halls, his mind mulling over all the possible things Leon could do. There was nothing that really came to mind though. But Leon did say that it was a long recovery time. That made Gwaine slightly afraid. He wasn’t entirely sure how cruel Leon could get. 

“Ah, Gwaine.” Speak of the devil. Leon came up beside Gwaine. “Where are you headed?” he asked. He seemed rather innocent for someone who was going to do some awful prank. 

“To the armory. I need to see if my sword if there,” Gwaine answered. Leon’s smile was slightly unnerving. He knew something that Gwaine didn’t. Gwaine picked up his pace. Leon matched it easily. 

“I hope you’re prepared. What I have planned for the day is going to be so much fun,” Leon said. He never once stopped smiling. His eyes were looking rather crazy as well. Gwaine nodded fearfully.

“I’m sure it will be a blast,” Gwaine said, leaving Leon behind.

“Bye now, enjoy your day,” Leon called. 

Gwaine made it to the armory and smiled when he saw his sword lying harmlessly on the bench. His smile faded when he saw there was a note attached to it. Gwaine picked it up and read it.

~Gwaine, I hope you’re prepared for your day. Something quite simple might slip past you if you’re not~ Leon’s words caused Gwaine to crumple the note and toss it aside. Leon was not going to get the better of him. 

For the rest of the day Gwaine was edgy and anxious. Each time someone passed him in the hall he would jump and skitter to the side, allowing them to pass, giving the knight a worried glance. Everything Gwaine ate was prepared himself. He checked behind every door before entering. He checked his boots before putting them on, his chair before sitting, and even the water in the bathtub. By the end of the day, Gwaine was a mess of frazzled nerves. 

oOoOoOo

“Merlin!” Merlin jumped at the sound of Leon’s voice suddenly being by his ear. He put down the boot he was polishing and turned to Leon. Leon had a very creepy smile on his face. It made Merlin shudder.

“What can I do for you Leon?” Merlin asked, trying his best not to be unnerved by the knight. Leon straightened up and sauntered over to the other bench. He sat down with grace and began examining an already polished boot. 

“I was just wondering if you’re prepared for today,” Leon said evenly. Merlin looked around, trying to see if there was somewhere Leon had set up a prank. Leon laughed.   
“Don’t worry. I’m not so unoriginal that I would do something like a bucket over the head,” Leon said, laughing. Merlin let out a nervous chuckle as well. Then what would Leon do?

“I didn’t think you would,” he responded. Leon smiled and stood up. 

“Have a nice day, Merlin,” he said, patting Merlin’s shoulder before leaving the room. Merlin shuddered and tried to get back to his task. He was never going to be able to concentrate today.

Merlin wasn’t much better than Gwaine the rest of the day. If felt like everyone was part of Leon’s plan to prank them. It didn’t help that Leon just seemed to appear next to Merlin at random intervals during the day, each time giving him a warning about his prank. He would then swagger away like nothing had happened. 

oOoOoOo

Arthur jumped as another piece of paper fluttered out of his jacket. 

“Dammit Leon,” he cursed under his breath. He picked up the note and threw it in the fire. The entire day had been filled with Arthur finding little notes throughout his chambers and castle. Leon made sure to stuff a good amount in places Arthur normally visited to ensure Arthur would get the message. 

~Prepare yourself.~

Arthur shook his head and put on the jacket. He was not afraid of what Leon was going to do. Leon wouldn’t hurt him. He wouldn’t tear down the castle. It was just a harmless prank.

“Hello, Arthur.”

“Dammit, Leon!” Arthur cried. He jumped around to see Leon leaning casually against the door. 

“We’re a bit on edge today. Aren’t we, sire?” Leon asked sweetly. Arthur shook his head and started walking out the door.

“I am just fine, Sir Leon,” Arthur said. No. There was no way that Leon would get the better than him with this prank. Arthur would have a servant open each and every door and go in first if that’s what it took. Leon would not win. 

“If you say so. I just hope you can handle what I’m going to throw at you,” Leon called from behind him. Of course Arthur could handle it. He was a king, not some girl’s petticoat. That still didn’t stop him from being extra vigilant through the day. He was not going to let Leon get the upper hand in this one. 

oOoOoOo

By the end of the day, everyone was exhausted. It wasn’t that they did a lot of hard work; they were just mentally tired from being so vigilant. Elyan sank back in his chair, massaging his brow. Gwaine was looking around, still slightly paranoid for Leon’s prank. Merlin jumped and went to the other side of the table when Leon tried to sit next to him. Lancelot was pacing back and forth, double-checking every nook and cranny for some sort of prank. Arthur was staring at Leon, not taking his eyes off the knight. Percival was looking worriedly around. Needless to say, everyone was on edge. Leon, for his part, was rather calm. He wasn’t on edge. He wasn’t jittery. He was just sitting there all calm and collected. Gaius and Geoffrey walked through the door and took their seats. 

“Everyone looks normal,” Gaius said. The men all jumped and turned to face them. 

“Other than the fact they seem afraid of their own shadows,” Geoffrey laughed. 

“Sir Leon, what was your prank?” Gaius asked. Leon grinned.

“Nothing,” he said. Gaius and Geoffrey both looked up. Merlin’s brow furrowed. 

“I’m sorry?” Gaius said.

“Well, I knew that after six days of being pranked in every way imaginable, everyone would be on edge. They would be extra vigilant so that I wouldn’t get the best of them. Instead of trying to sneak around setting up some elaborate trap, I merely scattered a few warnings throughout the castle and then teased the idea of an upcoming prank. That way, they would be on edge for the entire day, afraid of every little thing,” Leon explained. The men all sat with their jaws open. Leon really didn’t do…anything? But somehow, it still worked.

“You are evil,” Percival gasped. Leon smiled. 

“It wasn’t complicated and there was no way it could fail,” Leon responded. Gaius and Geoffrey whispered to each other before sitting back up.

“It was subtle, like Lancelot’s, yet fairly unique. The suspense if probably the best aspect of this particular one,” Geoffrey said.

“Yes, but it may have been too simple. The others required a lot more work and preparation. This was just going off paranoia that was already present,” Gaius replied.  
“But, that’s what makes it so brilliant. It shows that you do not need to put a lot of effort into something to make it work,” Geoffrey replied. 

“Well, who’s the winner?” Lancelot asked. The knights all nodded in agreement.

“We’ll need a few days to decide. Let us continue to discuss this,” Gaius said. The two left. 

“I hate you,” Merlin muttered, glaring at Leon.

“It was brilliant though,” Leon chuckled. Even if he didn’t win, he still had fun making everyone afraid.


	9. And the winner is...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the last chapter for this little story. I hope everyone enjoyed it. Just so everyone knows, Lancelot was in a close third with 4 votes, Merlin and Arthur were third with 2 votes, and Elyan and Percival were last with no votes. Time to see who the winner was! Gwaine, or Leon?

“I can’t believe Gaius and Geoffrey. I was way better at pranking than anyone else!” Arthur cried, swinging a sword at a dummy. 

“I just can’t believe they were split down the middle!” Elyan said, drinking some water. 

“I’m just glad someone decided to go with Merlin on his herb hunts. I worry about him,” Percival said. 

“I think Merlin is fine hunting for herbs on his own. Let’s focus on practice so that we can relax sooner. This is the first time this week that I haven’t had to worry about what’s in my bath water, bed, or closet,” Lancelot said.

oOoOoOo

“You didn’t really have to come with me. I’ve been gathering herbs on my own for a while now. You don’t have to worry about me,” Merlin sighed. 

“Nonsense, Merls, it’s what friends do for each other!” Gwaine said happily, skipping besides Merlin, picking up flowers on the way. “Do you think Lavender would like roses?” Gwaine asked.

“Why does everyone come to me for romantic advice?” Merlin sighed.

“Because you really know a way to a woman’s heart,” Leon answered. 

“At least you know some of the herbs I’m looking for. I swear Gwaine is just picking things that look neat,” Merlin said. Leon laughed and picked up some bitterroot, putting it in Merlin’s basket.

“But you guys really wanted to spend you days off wandering around the forest with me?” Merlin asked. Leon shrugged. 

“I wanted to get out of the castle. Tomorrow I’ll probably curl up with a book and read the day away,” he said.

“And I will be taking a lovely and lucky young lady out for a magnificent night,” Gwaine said from up ahead. Merlin shook his head in amusement. Even though he didn’t win, he was glad to have some company on these hunts. Usually they were so boring by himself. But now he had Gwaine and Leon with him. They were good company. Gwaine was entertaining with his loud and raunchy tales. Leon had a dry sort of humor with him. He was sarcastic and low key. Merlin never knew how good Leon’s company really was. Now he was with two good friends wandering through the forest, collecting herbs. Gwaine and Leon really did deserve to win. Although, Merlin thought that everyone deserved to win. But he was a little glad Arthur didn’t win. He couldn’t even imagine what the prat would make them do. Merlin picked out a yellow flower that Gwaine had put in his basket. At least these two were enjoying their days off. And even if Merlin or the others didn’t win the prank war, they still had a fun week. 

The End


End file.
